I've been learning alot the past few days. In my last post I talked about being quiet and listening for God, having a conversation with Him as opposed to talking at him and then not waiting for a reply or listening for what He has to say. Well, what I have realized in the past few days is that I have been limiting God, even in my attempts to open up to Him and let Him speak. It's not just about hearing Him speak to me in my quiet time or through my scripture reading, it's about seeing him through out my day and letting Him speak to me through many different channels.
One such way is music. I love music. I love to sing. (I'm terrible and I know it.) But I still love to sing out at the top of my lungs and know that my Father delights in my feeble attempts at praise, my neighbor my not love it, but I'm not worried about that. Worship is a time of letting go and opening your heart to God.
As I said I like music, I have a few songs on my iPod, just a couple thousand of my favorites. As I was getting ready for work this morning a song by Matthew West started to play "Out of My Hands" I'm sure I've heard this song many times before, but this morning I listened. God meet with me this morning through a simple song.
As I get ready to go to Denver this weekend, as I prepare for what could be the next step in my life and ministry, I have come to the realization that it's out of my hands. Despite my plans and my desires and my practicalities and my reasoning, God was just asking for my surrender. Let's make that my complete surrender. I have "surrendered" to the point of agreeing that ministry and missions was my "calling" if you will. But I hadn't given God the complete control and direction of my choices. So, he finally knocked me upside the head with my iPod and said "let go!"(It makes me think of the V8 commercials where the person gets smaked in the head: "should have had a V8") So here it is, God's divine slap to the back of my head:
Matthew West "Out of My Hands"
There you go changing my plans again
There you go shifting my sands again
For reasons I don't understand again
Lately I don't have a clue
Just when I start liking what I see
There you go changing my scenery
I never know where you're taking me
But I'm trying just to follow you
It's out of my hands
It's out of my reach
It's over my head And it's out of my league
There's too many things
That I don't understand
So it's into your will
And it's out of my hands
There you go healing these scars again
Showing me right where you are again
I'm helpless, and that's where I start again
I'm giving it all up to you
It's out of my hands
It's out of my reach
It's over my head
And it's out of my league
There's too many things
That I don't understan
So it's into your will
And it's out of my hands
Move me, make me
Choose me, change me
Send me, shake me
Find me, remind me
The past is behind me
Take it all away
Take it all from me, I pray
It's out of my hands
It's out of my reach
It's over my head
And it's out of my league
There's too many things
That I don't understand
So it's into your will
And it's out of my hands
April 16, 2010 at 12:36 PM
I just found your blog through Teenage Musings, my friend Kyla's blog. I do believe that she mentioned you in a letter to me. Probably because of the fact that I am learning Mardarin too and feel called to be a missionary in Asia (either China, India, or Nepal).
We are currently in the process of adopting my sister from China and I should be spending two weeks in China in May/June when we go and get her. Going to China will be a dream come true for me! I have a feeling like I won't ever want to leave and come back to the States.
Where did you stay when you were in China? Did you do mission work while you were there? I'd love to hear back from you and learn from your time in China last summer that I read about in your profile.
Love in Christ and Forever in Him,
Cassie
http://insidecassiesmind.blogspot.com/
cassie{at}literaryladies{dot}com